Another Bus Stop Theory

a path for me, and a path for you

Imagine you are at a bus stop. People are boarding different buses to go to different destinations. You board bus No.25 with some twenty other people to the same destination.

The bus takes off and two stops after three passengers get down. The bus keeps moving and at different stops, people drop off.

Ten stops later, the bus stands still. It has arrived at its final bus stop, and you drop off.

While boarding the bus, it might have looked like you were all going to the same destination, however, at different stops, some people came down, and it continued that way till the bus reached its final destination.

In life, you’d see people you consider similar to you, in aspirations, actions or otherwise do things and you’d be tempted to imitate them because we are all similar or going in the same direction —an assumption you should try to avoid.

Don’t follow in their ways unless you have a reason to do so.

That three people dropped off after the second bus stop does not mean you too should. They have arrived at their destination and you haven’t, just yet.

You will recognise your folly when you follow them only for them to take another bus leading them even closer to their goal, and you are left to wander.

Follow your path, with patience and doggedness, and you’ll arrive pretty much where you want to be, or somewhere even better than where you wanted to be.

During exams when I was in secondary school, once my classmates began to submit their answer booklets, I got the urge to stand up and go and submit too. Never really figured out why, but my dad warned me to never do that unless I did not have anything else to write on my paper. ¹

For most people, especially young people when we want to start a thing- anything, we tend to mirror someone else, or at least be inspired by someone who has trod the path we are looking to tread.

At the same time, we worry about being original, being true to ourselves.

Think of it this way: we all want to be good at what we do— a 10x engineer, the best product manager, a good host, an artist with the best designs, a writer whose prose flows like a river— and we agree that we have to start somewhere.

It is normal to expect ourselves to have role models, or at least something or someone we try to emulate. In trying to copy that person’s style, we find our path.

In the beginning, there is little to differentiate us from others trying to achieve similar goals. With time, however, the difference could not be any more clearer.

There will be those that have become better, some worse or have dropped off and most are average.

Different people drop off at different stops because while our direction may be the same, the destination may not.

Money Angle

Keeping up with the Joneses is exactly what this is.

You try hard to meet a living standard that is not yours to begin with. At the end of the day, you discover that the Joneses are in debt and maybe at the brink of bankruptcy… and that’s where you’d end up if you go down that path.

If you are wondering why your finances should be personal, this will be a good read for you.

Personal Finance

Summary

You’d start somewhere —with a lot of people at the same place/time —on your journey, follow your path but know that in the beginning, it will look like someone else’s path.

With time, patience, and practice you’d deviate from everyone else’s path to create your own unique path.

Don’t be in a haste to create your own path, and don’t follow someone else’s path too.

The difference between good and exceptional isn’t hours worked- it’s the depth of thought applied to the right problems.

Thank you for reading and see you next time.

1. I don’t know how he knew that I did that